Please

Somebody tell me what the point of Bill Kaulitz's existence is.

The guy confuses me. Is he German orJapanese, Male or Female a douchebag or a prickwad?
I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS BUT SO LITTLE ANSWERS.

Eurgh

I hate hospitals. They smell weird, and have this depressing feel about them. I hate seeing ill people as well, it makes me feel all depressed, therefore making me feel the need to make inappropriate jokes causing elderly ladies to give me evils.
Mum's okay-It turned out to be Gall Bladder stones, but it still means she has to spend the next few days in hospital and its horrible seeing a drip attatched to her. Plus she is bored out of her mind half the time.

Starting college on Wednesday which I'm quite exited about. It's a completely new start and it means I can forget about this amazingly shitty and depressing summer I've had. (Minus Reading of course.) But I'm going to stop complaining about how crap things are, because I hate reading blogs where people can only talk about how shit their lives are and that they want to die.

Oh, postsecret.





Spent a stupid amount on a cardigan the other day. Plus I saw a pair of leather trousers in the topshop sales hidden behind all the racks of clothes, meaning that nobody had probably found it in a long while. Plus it was going for £30 rather than £80. BUT THEY WERE A SIZE 6.
I wished I had bought them now though just so I could have ebayed them. I would have made shitloads of money from it.
LOOK

Also, the other night I had the word "Fabergé Egg" stuck in my head. Now I have the word "Melanoma" annoying me.
HJFKHJFDKLSFD

My mum has to go to hospital. I feel like complete and utter shit and I want my Mum right now.

I miss every single little thing about him.

FUK ALL DA H8RZ

"rihanna can sing otherwise the record company wud neva hav invested in her and 4 those haters out there i dont see U fuckin performin on MTV makin millionz of dollars so shut the fuck up u retarded nipplez. at least shez makin an honest livin and not standin at a corner of a street bout 2 giv sum..if u dont like her music turn it off no onez forcin u 2 listen or watch her performances/music but ur sori lil pathetic excuse for humans.."



Best youtube comment I have ever seen.

BAYBEHHHHHH

I came downstairs this morning and thought my mother was pregnant.

It was actually her holding a vase under her jumper to stop it from getting damaged or something.
For a second I was shitting myself thinking that I was going to have another little sibling. I think I would actually leave the house if I had to have a little brother or sister. One is enough and I hate babies/toddlers anyways. Plus a the age difference would be gross.
Omg I am so happy it was just a vase.

I woke up too early and have nothing to do until 7.30. Going to a resturaunt for Annas Birthday. To wear heels or not to wear heels? I doubt I will as otherwise I will probably scare people, but I haven't actually worn these out yet.<3<3<3

Who remembers these...?

I want to personally strangle whoever came up with these, slash open their stomachs and make them wear their own entrails as a scarf. That would probably be a better look. This bag is everything I hate in a handbag-It is small, tacky and will probably be swinging off the shoulder of some 15-year old mother who has a penchant for Bacardi Breezers and going to Capital VIP.

I was just on a website and saw a photo of this monstrocity and felt the need to express my hatred.

Also, Tatu are doing the Marc Jacobs A/W 2008 Campaign. Is it weird to be exited about it?
Their CD was the first one I ever bought and the sad thing is that I still remember all the words. I was a really retarded child. I never even liked the Spice Girls like every one else.



Marc Jacobs do the leather/checked trends well. I bought a skirt from Primark which copied the Marc by Marc Jacobs dogtooth print and I had to totally customize it as it was such a bad fit. But the Marc Jacobs collection is amazing this season, however I still have to hand it to Givenchy and Vivienne Westwood. Chanel is terrible at the moment. I expected better from you Mr. Lagerfeld.

But scratcherrrrrrrrrrr

I am lazy and will bullet point the weekend:

• Saw Justice, Simian, Dizzee and Digitalism being stupendously good.
• Missed a lot of RATM which I will probably regret for a very very very long time.
• A "free hug" turned into a "free tongue down your throat".
  
• Collecting cups to buy food and cigarettes, then almost whoring out my body to an old man for a stack of cups he had. I feel ashamed, but a girls gotta eat!
• Bumped into practically everyone we knew, and still felt majorly confused each time.
• Lorna tripped over a guide rope and I don't think I have ever seen anyone fly so far.
• Talie got captured in a party and we had to help her party her way out or she would have been partied to death.
• Seb slept. A lot.
• Ramdomly talked to some people about MC Hammer and discovered one of them was going to my sixth form next year, and she had connections with people we knew. SPOOKY
• Hotboxing a tent with some people camping next to us and laughing a bit too much about AIDs and syphilis.
• The ginger man with the receding hairline O_o
• Being proposed to. Now my name is Yasmin Miller. Then 5 seconds later a weird blonde guy tried it on with me and Lorna. I AM A MARRIED WOMAN YOU KNOW.
• Seing 27 condom balloons, 12 hairy bumcracks, 2 Borat thong-swimsuits, and about 73283247824749832 Agyness Deyn hair cuts. LULZ IT$ ALL BOUT ALIZ D£LLAL NOW. U gaiz r l8.
• A disgusting lack of bollocks (not in the sense where one is so sex obsessed, they need a constant stream of penis loving) being replaced by butt scratcher which was slightly feeble in comparison.
• Losing my voice and having practically everyone telling me I sound like a retarded version of Elmo.
• Meeting some boys who were looking for weed, then later seeing them again and finding out they managed to buy £40 worth of weed, sell it for £50 and got to keep some.
• Seeing a rather lovely gay friend being a pedophile and getting off with a 12 year old girl. I'M STILL LAFFIN BOUT DAT.
• /10? /10?
• Norris. I think that is most possibly one of my favourite names ever.
• Stump fun. This includes discussions on stump-fucking and tucking my arm into my jumper then asking people to hi-5 me. I have never seen so many people scream in fear/look disgusted.
• Convincing this paraletic boy that I had a cockroach living in my arm.
  
• A certain person dancing ;]

I am tired of listing things now, but there was way more. I couldn't be bovvad to get photos developed today so I'll go tomorrow at some point.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY FOR TOMORROW ANNA.
MUCH LOVE 4 U.

Reading

Was too good. This one beat the past two years by far. I can;t be arsed to blog about it properly, so I'll write about it tomorrow at some point when I've had some sleep.
ALSO HI WILLIAM AND SHANE. I don't remember what was meant to be quoted, but at least you're in here.

I am too exited for my photos to be developed tomorrow too. Some of them will be soooo bad. On the train home we remembered all the photos we took last night.
O_o
Goddd

Results

Engliash Lang-A*
English Lit-A
GermanA*
Maths-C
Art-A*
Drama-A
Dutch-B
Manufacturing-DD
Religious Studies-C
Science-CC

Pretty happy with my results, but I wish I had gotten a B in science as I'm taking Biology and Chemistry next year, but as it was borderline B, I'm sure they'll be lenient about it.
Now I have to wait until 3:30 to enrol at Twyford, and then head over to Reading festival. Hope all of Lornas ticket stuff is sorted, as I'm going all nervy spaz. So I will be at Reading Quite late.
I am now going to watch some Malcolm In The Middle to calm me down. Plus I have over 3 hours to wait.

Boyed by the boyfriend.

Bastard.


(SKILLED ALLITERATION RIGHT THERE)

But I actually thought he was different from every other bloke. Guess I was wrong.
Oh god the cliché of that overused phrase is too bad, bit it aptly fits the situation, so I feel I have the right to use it.

Instead of listening to Hawthorne Heights and crying, feebly slashing my wrists with a pair of scissors, I will try and attempt being an adult, (Oh the irony) and take it in my stride. I shall also stop blogging about this as I sound like a douchebag.

SAY NO TO EMO.

O my actual daysssssssss

Scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared scared
Not looking forward to this at all.












However I am looking forward to have proper human contact for the first time in weeks.

But my nervousness has made me start counting stairs like I used to.
:/

HOME

Thank da lord.

Dublin was actually quite nice, but generally the whole holiday was very wet, windy and cold. Making up for that in the October holidays if I go with family somewhere, unless I go to Amsterdam with Lorn/ New York with Soph (MAJORLY POOR ATM THOUGH).
Ireland was full of ginger people though, but for some reason I kept ending up talking to French men-Pretty sure It's some sort of sixth sense. Plus I wanted to kidnap this dog, Pip. I love animals, but I barely ever "awwww" at them, making me feel like some sort of heartless man-beast. But this dog was probably the CUTEST-WUTEST ICKLY FLUFFYBALL I HAVE EVER SEEN.(I blame the weather for the state of baldness I am in, however I have no excuse for the size of the schnozz.)

But at least I'm back-Going to do some Reading shopping tomorrow and then go collect my exam results and head on over to the Festival.

Plus I think my boyfriend's going to break up with me,which is a pretty happy thought.
I don't know.
I really miss him and his lanky Frenchness so much, but he doesn't realise just how much. Should be sorting that all out tomorrow hopefully, but it is making me into some depressed nervous wreck, and one minute I'm really happy and the next I just want to cry.

I wish I had a hobby which could take my mind off things, like wood carving or something.

Jus chillin in Ireland

Bad weather.
Good surf.

Somehow managed to get a tan even though theres barely been any sun. In the past 2 days I have seen two very, very wrong things.
Going horseriding now (LOL) and will log properly when I get back. I miss my French one too much right now.


EXITED FOR READING.

Holy mother fucking jeezusss

Before I leave for Ireland, (I come back on the 19th) I will leave you with a photo of one of the most disturbing things I have seen in a long time. If you squint it looks real.


I DONT CARE WAT U SAY-ITZ REAL! I'm sure the bag was probably a random chihuahua saved from a Chinese restaurant, probably thinking it was saved. Then only to be hollowed out and covered in a layer of leather.
PETA wouldn't approve.
I actually hate PETA. don't like being told what to do/eat/wear.
Animals taste good.
Let me eat them






BAI.
See you gaiz l8r.

Oh dear

Dizzee,

WHAT HAVE YOU DONE???

Firecrotch

I had a dream last night that Lindsay Lohan told me she was a lesbian then we went to Thorpe Park.



Boyfriend is still ill, so I probably won't be seeing him until after Reading. Going to Ireland tomorrow to surf with the family. Their feeble excuses of "There will be kids your age" just makes me throw up in my mouth a little, and puts me off life in general. I hate how adults always assume that you will automatically get on with people who share your age. No.
They will probably all be 15-year old social retards in tracksuits knowing how my luck has been this holiday. Argh everything is so shit and I miss my Frenchie so so so much. Three weeks of not seeing your boyfriend is a fucking pile of shit.
Next year there is no way that I am being dragged anywhere on "holiday" by my family. I'll cut off my finger or something if they do.

PAINNNNNNNNN

Waxing makes me wish I was a man. Society would allow me to walk round like a hairy beast and nobody would care. Or maybe I should move to China. (On the subway in Beijing it was not a pleasant experience being pressed up against women's armpits I'll tell you that.)

So here I am now in all my sore-legged glory with NOTHING TO DO.
Everyone is on holiday apart from a few, (Thank God for Ramesh) plus the boyfriend is ill so I didn't see him the other day and yet again made up for my loneliness with my debit card. It's been 2 weeks since I last saw him. SHAMEFUL.

I have spent the past 2 days either shopping (ON MY OWN LIKE A RIGHT LONER) or watching Malcolm in the middle. I have decided that I am going to have a child like Dewey. I am going to force him to look like Dewey as well, maybe with some DIY plastic surgery and a few boxes of hair dye. Then I will make him watch Malcolm In The Middle from the day he's born until he starts to behave in the same way as Dewey does.
I love Dewey.


I just realised none of my blogging mentions social interaction. I could just as well be a whelk or something-It would make no difference to my social life.(But at least I would have seaweed to talk to or something.)

MY GOD THIS SUMMER HAS BEEN ONE SHIT PILE OF LONLINESS.
I want Reading to hurry up before I set fire to my sorry self and run onto the M25 during rush hour.

IZ BAK

Fiiiinally I'm back from Holland after a whole week of seeing ancient great-aunts and other relatives. But on the plus side, I am now a master at card games, walking round aimlessly and buying bread. (I made about 6481239123 trips to the shop to curb my boredom.)
I hav no luv 4 Holland no more. I will happily sell my heritage for some magic beans or some shit like that.


Highlight of the week was going shopping when my gran was out and buying this really nice skirt, even though it was ludicrously priced. But it should work for the gothic trend in A/W if I match it with a white lacy Victorian-style blouse or a checkered shirt with a pussy bow. Am going shopping again tomorrow to get something along those lines and these heels from French Connection. My wardrobe keeps expanding at the rate of knots, so college next year should be goooooood.



ALSO SEEING THE BOY TOMORROW.
I haven't actually seen him in two weeks and I've only had phonecalls with him discussing porn and men touching themselves, now I know romance is dead.
EXIIITED!
<3