Today's my Dad's Birthday, and he said he wanted a lie-in, so I didn't get to sleep until about 3am, then to be woken up at 9. I cannot believe this is his idea of a lie-in.
Then again I am in no way a morning person. I usually look/behave like a monster anytime before 12.
Seeing the French one tonight, but only if he can ANSWER HIS PHONE. I was meant to stay at his last night but the fishwife was out with all his French buddiezzz. I have this image in my head of all these really european men dancing to Scooter and other gay techno-trance music(eurgh) which isn't a great image.
OH GOD
I JUST REMEMBERED SOMETHING.
This is ultimate cringe but possibly one of the most hilarious things that has ever happened to me. The first time I went back to his place, he put on music.
I am not into the whole putting on music and lighting loads of candles thing that most men seem to assume women love so I wasn't too keen on this. (I AM MISS ROMANCE KILLER. I bite the heads off teddy bears like Ozzy bites the heads off bats)
Earlier he'd been telling me how recently he'd been listening to a lot of David Bowie and I said I quite enjoyed a bit of Bowie too.
I don't think I have ever been so mortified in my entire life(Unless you include the time my friend's Dad walked in on me whilst I was in the shower) as when "Grounddd controll to majorr Tommm" playing ever before. I'm assuming he saw the look on my face as he switched it off pretty quickly. On the way home the next day I sat on the bus laughing (BY MYSELF) because I remembered how hilarious it was.
I felt for him as he seemed pretty upset that I didn't appreciate listening to David Bowie's Greatest Hits while getting it on.
I still find it pee-inducingly funny to this day, bless him, he seemed so into it as well. Men are hilarious.
I have no idea how I'm going to stay awake tonight as I am totally knackered. Watch how I just fall asleep on his front door step. Because of my weight he won't be able to lift me and will jsut leave me there, only to find I've been kidnapped and am being sold in variety buckets of chicken. (He lives in Camberwell, home of KFC, Chicken Cottage, Chicken Shack etc.. so its expected)
But if that happens to me I don't want to hear any David Bowie at my funeral.
I just found a scratch on my neck and it's annoying me cos it keeps opening up and bleeding everywhere. The man in the cornershop down the road asked if I was okay as I had all this blood running down my neck, looking like I'd just been to the Peckham rappers convention trying to spit some bars. I could never be a rapper as I'd suck. HOWEVER aaages ago at Underage Club when Patrick Wolf Played (GAYGAYGAY) I managed to make the best rap ever. I nor anyone else remembers what I said, but Jessie agreed it was amazing.
But other than that I suck. Maybe I should move in with Frenchie in Camberwell and become hard. Actually I don't want to live with his flatmates who dance round in their underwear at 11am totally off their faces after doing vodka shots with their breakfast. One of them broke up with their girlfriend of like 6 years, but then again he's been using that excuse for months apparently. I know id I lived with them it would increase my alcohol intake by about 152%.
I drink copious amounts most weekends already, then again this is because I am a London teenager, so I have to fit into the binge-drinking stereotype OBVOUZLYY. (Actually I just use that as a pathetic excuse to cover for all the times I've shouted dumb things at people I don't know and threw up/fallen over things.)
I don't actually know what I'm talking about anymore I am too tired for this.
Then again I am in no way a morning person. I usually look/behave like a monster anytime before 12.
Seeing the French one tonight, but only if he can ANSWER HIS PHONE. I was meant to stay at his last night but the fishwife was out with all his French buddiezzz. I have this image in my head of all these really european men dancing to Scooter and other gay techno-trance music(eurgh) which isn't a great image.
OH GOD
I JUST REMEMBERED SOMETHING.
This is ultimate cringe but possibly one of the most hilarious things that has ever happened to me. The first time I went back to his place, he put on music.
I am not into the whole putting on music and lighting loads of candles thing that most men seem to assume women love so I wasn't too keen on this. (I AM MISS ROMANCE KILLER. I bite the heads off teddy bears like Ozzy bites the heads off bats)
Earlier he'd been telling me how recently he'd been listening to a lot of David Bowie and I said I quite enjoyed a bit of Bowie too.
I don't think I have ever been so mortified in my entire life(Unless you include the time my friend's Dad walked in on me whilst I was in the shower) as when "Grounddd controll to majorr Tommm" playing ever before. I'm assuming he saw the look on my face as he switched it off pretty quickly. On the way home the next day I sat on the bus laughing (BY MYSELF) because I remembered how hilarious it was.
I felt for him as he seemed pretty upset that I didn't appreciate listening to David Bowie's Greatest Hits while getting it on.
I still find it pee-inducingly funny to this day, bless him, he seemed so into it as well. Men are hilarious.
I have no idea how I'm going to stay awake tonight as I am totally knackered. Watch how I just fall asleep on his front door step. Because of my weight he won't be able to lift me and will jsut leave me there, only to find I've been kidnapped and am being sold in variety buckets of chicken. (He lives in Camberwell, home of KFC, Chicken Cottage, Chicken Shack etc.. so its expected)
But if that happens to me I don't want to hear any David Bowie at my funeral.
I just found a scratch on my neck and it's annoying me cos it keeps opening up and bleeding everywhere. The man in the cornershop down the road asked if I was okay as I had all this blood running down my neck, looking like I'd just been to the Peckham rappers convention trying to spit some bars. I could never be a rapper as I'd suck. HOWEVER aaages ago at Underage Club when Patrick Wolf Played (GAYGAYGAY) I managed to make the best rap ever. I nor anyone else remembers what I said, but Jessie agreed it was amazing.
But other than that I suck. Maybe I should move in with Frenchie in Camberwell and become hard. Actually I don't want to live with his flatmates who dance round in their underwear at 11am totally off their faces after doing vodka shots with their breakfast. One of them broke up with their girlfriend of like 6 years, but then again he's been using that excuse for months apparently. I know id I lived with them it would increase my alcohol intake by about 152%.
I drink copious amounts most weekends already, then again this is because I am a London teenager, so I have to fit into the binge-drinking stereotype OBVOUZLYY. (Actually I just use that as a pathetic excuse to cover for all the times I've shouted dumb things at people I don't know and threw up/fallen over things.)
I don't actually know what I'm talking about anymore I am too tired for this.
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